LIFE

I have stared my computer screen for a good ten minutes trying to figure out where I left off.
However, I'm starting to realize it's slightly impossible because so much goes in my life that my brain begins to only keep what is most important and just discard the rest. And when I get clarity in my mind, it will then inspire logic.

Lately, I have been lost in a sea of homework, 3 books, and work. I can honestly admit to missing time for myself. I promise I do not say that selfishly. I am just so task oriented that penciling in time for people and myself always ends up getting erased.
I see myself slowly evolving into a home-body. You probably would too if you had my schedule.

This lifestyle that I am slowly, but not quite adapting to has firmly put some important attributes to the test. Attributes that include; balancing life, homework, boyfriend, friends, family, sorority sisters..
putting priorities first, and BUDGETING.
My planner has became my best friend. Luckily my actual best friends are accepting of that. Along with being a perfectionist and an organized devotee you can only imagine what it looks like if you were to open my planner to today's date. I have also had to sacrifice a lot since this semester has started. It's bittersweet but if I tried to find room for non-priority events I would turn into a walking zombie. Trust me, it isn't an enticing look for me.

The biggest endeavor is learning how to successfully budget. At one point I took scissors to my debit card. And no, I am not exaggerating. My card is probably scattered in pieces in a landfill somewhere. I just became so frustrated that I could not control my spending. Re-reading that sentence makes me sound like a delirious individual but I get the notion that someone can become that way when their not fully content with what they already have.
Yes, there is a huge blinking arrow pointing at me right now.

That is why I started this new book called Constantly Craving. Feeling content is like a roller coaster ride for me. There will be times I will hit a peak and then hit the bottom so abruptly that also included a bumpy ride on the way down. Gratification is only ever a short period of time but I'm slowly learning how to not let that itch for me return. I learned that feeling happy comes as an addition to feeling content. However, being content is having the ability to grasp the idea that happiness comes and goes.

My goal is to conquer all of this here in the next couple of months and then
toast with a hot cup of tea, in my bed with warms socks and a chick flick. Sounds pretty ideal for me.

xoxo,
Dom